Figuring it out

Going through my first post today makes me smile.. reminds me of how terribly young I was... and sounding super human.
This blog has been around for close to a decade and it has achieved nothing.
Neither have I.
But its okay..

From talking aloud about social issues and awareness and activism, if I have changed my gaze inwards and have come down to taking one day at a time and living it... that was a lesson worth learning over a decade.
And even if I have not learned anything or changed a bit, then too.. its okay.

If I have rolled up my sleeves every day to fight a battle that was already lost..
If I have banged on doors that have been shut on me, or shouted my head out at a deaf person and still not learnt how pointless it is..
If I have learned to trust and give and live.. and sometimes to doubt and lose faith
If I have stumbled and hurt myself and crawled half the way and still remember the walk ways for the beautiful shade..
If I havent yet found answers to the big questions of life.. who am i? why am i here? what am i doing? what can i do? How can i build a purpose in life? "Whither do we go?" infact..
Or if I never took the time to ask those questions..
Its still okay..

I am still figuring it out.. and there is still time.
Whither do we go......
Maybe there are no answers.. Maybe there never will be..

Today this space goes mute..
But here is hoping that the blogger goes away for a jolly good break, comes back to a different space and  finds something new to say...!
In the meanwhile, everything's okay...

Once there was a song

Once there was a song
A cheerful song
With a rustle of silk skirts in the breeze
With a steady clumpety-clump of heavy soiled feet
On the paddy fields.

Once there was a song
That rose like the happy curve
Of a plump maiden's cheeks
A rare flat note like rancid butter
But up it would come again
A light breezy note of sunshine

Once there was a song
I am sure..I heard it afterall!
It just came to me on an evening
As I quietly sat by reading..
And I tapped to it and sang aloud
And a moment's magic it had wound

Once there was a song
It was here just now..
For a snatch..and then gone..
Funny a chill that I never knew
Now grows into me..,up my bone
A merry song that left me cold..
A merry song that left me cold..

The legacy

Armed with one of those intense kohl eyeliners , out she took her pocket mirror and squinted at it to find her mother staring out from the mirror at her, claiming her silence. Bereft of a moment that would never add to her memories or her wisdom, she studied the face vacantly... vaguely acknowledging that same life that she had scoffed at a million times.